Loving the lost

[beetiger]

The depression is hitting heavy again, the way it did a few years back. I recognize it now, so I'm hoping I can meet it part way before it blindsides me, this time. Casual IMs and friendliness help a lot with that, so don't be shy.

But I don't want to talk about that. The main reason I haven't posted much lately is that I don't want to talk about that, and that's been most of what's on my mind, except for T-shirts about which I suspect you are bored.
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At one of my previous jobs I had a friend who was a literalist Christian. She was a sweet person, and we were sincerely friends -- we sang together in the company choir that went to nursing homes at Christmastime, she helped me choose bridesmaids' dresses for my wedding, we talked a lot. But I knew that she was utterly and completely sure that I was going to Hell.

I can easily see why I could be friends with her; I just thought she was wrong on that topic, and it wasn't an important topic to me, so I just connected with her on other things. But I find it hard to understand how she could be friends with me, believing that I was damned. Perhaps she thought that there was still a chance there somewhere. Or perhaps, like those who befriend the elderly or those with terminal illness without worrying about how much time they'll have together, she just thought she'd share her love in the present and not wory about the ultimate results.

When does it make sense to give up on a lost cause?

Comments

[velvetpage.livejournal.com]

Having been, at one point in my life, in the position of the Christian in this scenario, I can sympathise some with both sides.

I never was friends with people purely for the purpose of converting them. Christians are taught that a Godly life will be constantly thinking about the "lost" and praying for them, and for me, that was simply a part of my mental life at the time. I got many benefits from their friendship, and I'm sure they got many from mine, when the conversion issue slipped to the background for a while. I did not, at any time, think of them as trophies in my Christian walk - they were the prey I'd hunted. It really doesn't work like that.

On the one or two occasions when someone has asked me why I associated with them when their beliefs were so different from mine, the answer was simply that we were friends. If they pressed me, the issue of conversion might have come up because it was a large part of my mental landscape. It was never the primary reason or even the most important one, since even as a teenager I had issues with the concept of conversion.

I suppose my question is - were they uncomfortable with your paganism, or were you the one who was uncomfortable with their Christianity?

[cktraveler.livejournal.com]

I have friends now who are devout Christians. What said friends have in common is the belief that provided one is living a Christlike life, it doesn't matter whether one is living it in Christ's name, or in Allah's, or in Buddha's, or in Zeus's or Re's or Odin's (Matthew 25:31-46).

The Great Commission is not a part of all Christianity, nor is it something that is necessarily deserving of tolerance simply because it is a belief. It is, at its base, a fundamental lack of tolerance on the part of those who believe it, the idea that those who are different from the self are inferior or deluded, and must change to become like the self. That's prejudice, and that single belief has been at the root of most of the most shameful episodes in church history.

From your comment it sounds as though you were able to work through the issue and learn to accept diversity (which is actually a far more Christlike attitude). That's something to be proud of, and grateful for; a lot of people never manage to do that.

In any case, it is not my religion that was the issue for these people, but my sexuality, and that's not just prejudice, it's outright bigotry.

[velvetpage.livejournal.com]

Point taken. I know plenty of Christians who abhor evangelism. Unfortunately, growing up in the Salvation Army, I didn't have a lot of support for my budding intolerance of intolerance.