Unthinkable

[beetiger]

When I was a little girl, I had a toy robot that was actually an eight track player. It came with trivia tapes and utilized the four tracks to let you press buttons to answer and get different responses. I also used to play my father's limited selection of regular eight-track tapes on it.

The main thing I remember listening to, over and over, was a tape of songs by Jim Croce. For some reason today, I've got these lyrics in my head:
You don't tug on Superman's cape
You don't spit into the wind
You don't pull the mask off the old Lone Ranger
And you don't mess around with Jim.

So my question to you all this afternoon is this: In your experience, what are some other things that you just don't do?

Comments

[gen.livejournal.com]

I don't sing in the shower.
I don't eat my brocolli.
I don't wear dresses.

...

I'll probably think of more at around 2AM and stay up the rest of the night writing them down, and then LiveJournal will crash and eat them all and I'll cry like a baby...

Just say no

[krdbuni.livejournal.com]

From the same source, you also don't mess around with Slim (the one who /did/ mess around with Jim in the end, quite successfully at that).

To these, I would have to add the following do-nots:

1. Never drink grape juice, Dr Pepper or Kool Aid while wearing anything white.


2. Never try to play a data CD in an audio CD player.


3. Never light your cigarette without brushing your hair out of the way first.


4. Never say never. *grin*

(Never get them wet, never expose them to light, and never EVER feed them after midnight....)

Kristy

[freeko.livejournal.com]

Well it is subjective but here are the things I feel you just don't do

turn my back on a friend

argue with a person who has a loaded gun

take the name of kurdt kobain in vain

try to fight someone twice your size

never argue over the phone or on the internet

[terrycloth.livejournal.com]

I don't know... arguing in person is even worse, so it might be best to amend that to 'never argue'.

[secanth.livejournal.com]

There are filks set to this tune, but damned if I can think of any of 'em off the bat. I seem to remember one computer oriented one, a Swars one...and something fantasy related...

*sigh*

[oakenguy.livejournal.com]

You don't reply to spam

You don't try to take food away from a strange dog

You don't use the word 'nazi' in a flamewar

You don't try to change someone's mind about a point of SF or comic fandom. Politics, sure. Which Green Lantern was the best, no way.

[ahiruko.livejournal.com]

Green Arrow was so the cool one. ;>

Shout At The Devil!

[xydexx.livejournal.com]

Don't put Motley Crue tapes in Teddy Ruxpin dolls.

Re: Shout At The Devil!

[aynjel.livejournal.com]

There you go... spoiling all my fun...

[terrycloth.livejournal.com]

You don't taunt happy fun ball.

You don't talk to or acknowledge the object of your affection, lest they recoil in disgust.

You don't reply in-line to usenet posts or comments?

[ahiruko.livejournal.com]

I still have my 2-XL. *wicked grin* The unit still works, but the speaker wire inside is loose and I can't figure out how to get him open to tighten it. I have an array of Beatles tapes waiting for when I do. :>

Let's see ...

You don't give a Wookiee the finger.

You don't agree to wrestle a Sleeth.

You don't order pork tartare.

You don't buy "just one more booster pack."

And you don't Obfuscate when LARPing in a seedy bar. (The Mind's Eye Theatre sign for Obfuscate is, coincidentally enough, also a gang sign ...)

[beetiger.livejournal.com]

I still have my 2-XL. *wicked grin*

That's cool. I'm assuming mine got lost in my mother's move to a smaller house a few years back, but I should really check with her when I go visit this weekend.

[lediva.livejournal.com]

You don't forget to tell loved ones how much they mean to you.

Oh, by the way... love you! :)

;)

[queenofstripes.livejournal.com]

- Don't sleep in the subway.

- Don't stand in the falling rain.

- Don't fear the Reaper.

- Don't you forget about me.

- Don't stop thinking about tomorrow.

- Don't lose that number (whether your name is Rikki OR Billie).

- Don't cry out loud.

- Don't dream it's over.

- Don't pass me by.

- Don't make me cry.

- Don't leave me blue.

- Don't be cruel to a heart that's true.

- Don't allow no quartet singing in here.

- Don't think twice, it's all right.

- Don't, don't, don't let's start.

- Don't worry about the government.

- Don't grab. Don't clutch. Don't hope for too much. Don't breathe. Don't achieve or grieve without leave.

Re: ;)

[sythyry.livejournal.com]

Don't let the sun go down on me, Bones.

(or, for Trekkies, Don't allow the proximal bright stellar object to fellate me, Dr. McCoy.)

Re: ;)

[secanth.livejournal.com]

Never set the cat on fire (or the dog, the snake, the gerbil, or the frog...)

http://www.sccs.swarthmore.edu/org/swil/FILKS/filkbook4.html#21

Re: ;)

[sythyry.livejournal.com]

[Floki listens to "Never set the cat on fire" and looks personally hurt!]

Re: ;)

[paka.livejournal.com]

Don't you step on my blue suede shoes.

Don't turn around, o no! The commissar's in town, oh oh!

Unfortunately here I run out of song lyrics and have to resort to proverbs;

Never play leapfrog with a unicorn.

Never tell a hyena how hard you can bite.

Re: ;)

[paka.livejournal.com]

Oh and, of course;

Never get involved in a land war in Asia.

Never joke with a Sicilian when death is on the line! Ah ha ha! Ha ha ha ha ha

[mmsword.livejournal.com]

Never forget your sunscreen.
Never trust a man that tells you to trust him.
Never take anything for granted.
Never do tomarrow what you could do next week.
Never buy Chinnese food from a cauasian guy named Bob.
And what ever you do...
Never forget to tell the people you love that you love them. You never know if you'll ever have another chance to.

[perlandria.livejournal.com]

Just slip out the back, jack (http://www.lyricsfreak.com/s/simon-and-garfunkel/124680.html)
Make a new plan, stan
You don’t need to be coy, roy
Just get yourself free
Hop on the bus, gus
You don’t need to discuss much
Just drop off the key, lee
And get yourself free

[melskunk.livejournal.com]

Never tease a weasel, not even once
or twice. 'Cause weasels do not like it, and teasing isn't nice. ...

[tygermoonfoxx.livejournal.com]

You don't backstab a friend
You don't mix politics with religion
You don't confuse sex with intimacy
You don't interview for a job in jeans and a tee shirt
You don't answer your pager or phone in the movie theater
You don't play mind games with someone who isn't able to comprehend the concept
You don't tease someone who thinks in literal terms
You don't make your mother cry