beetiger

Several people on my friends list have posted dreams this morning, and it’s made me notice that I’ve been having no dreams lately, or at least no dreams that are still lingering in the edges of my mind when I awake. I’m not usually good at remembering my dreams, but generally I’ve got the feeling that there’s a story, an emotion, an image just floating away from me when I awake. But not lately. Pregnant women are often supposed to have very vivid dreams, so I’m a bit confused by this.

I also seem to be ending up in the minority of pregnant women who seem to have reduced libidos, even into the second trimester where we aren’t exhausted anymore. This is usually explained by discomfort or poor body image, neither of which I seem to have. My main discomfort is the sore shoulder from the fact that my current work projects have way too much mouse-work data entry in them, and I suppose that the fact that I’m planning to do some nude modeling tonight is evidence that I’m feeling okay about how I look.

Most likely, I’m just spending most of my subconscious energy keeping some low-level depression from sneaking up to the surface before I can notice it. This is something I’ve done my whole life, really; that plus the extra biological work may be taking all I have.