Wasting my morning

[beetiger]

Dear Verizon Marketing, and whomever set up the flow of Customer Service:

You are the worst organized company I have ever had to deal with.

Please do not send promotional letters for services that you cannot sell me.

Moreover, please do not spend hours of my time transferring me to someone who supposedly can sell it to me, and does, with a full process including confirmation with an uncanny valley voiced agent in India, and then dump the information into a void of nothingness, so that when I call a week later to find out why I have not gotten an installation call, you can tell me (after 6 transfers and almost an hour on hold, of course) that there is no record, and there is no way a record could have been created because you cannot, in fact, sell me that. And that, in fact, you don't have any planned date to put that service in my area at all.

Damn you all. If you ever do decide to offer FIOS TV in my area, you better be offering me a free HDTV again. Two of them. And a pony.

No love,
Vicki

Comments

[varjohaltia.livejournal.com]

Verizon has by far superior technical offerings to the local cable company. The local cable company has by far superior customer service.

Yard: Digdigdig.
Verizon: Oh hay! You can has FiOS now!
Me: Do want!
Verizon: Your address doesn't exist.
Me: What?
Verizon2: Wait, I have a clue and want to help and happen to be from the Florida call center. Pokepokepoke. Oh, your address is all wonky in the system. You have to give the street direction after the street name and can't use the avenue designation, then we can find it. Unfortunately you can't have your employer pay for internets, we don't support that in our systems.
Me: Oh well. Gimme your name and number!
*Two days later*
Verizon3: You can't have FiOS.
Me: Yes I can. Call Verizon2. I want just TV, not internet or phone.
Verizon3: *Calls Verizon2* Sure thing! Enjoy your FiOS!
Me: *Enjoying FiOS* I want to pay my bill.
Verizon: What's the phone number or email associated with the account?
Me: Er, there aren't any. *Gives contact number just in case.*
Verizon: Okay, doesn't work. Also can't find it based on address. What's your account number?
Me: Ha! I have the bill here. *Read account number off the bill.*
Verizon: Um... That's three digits longer than our account numbers and not in the right format.
Me: Well... That's what it says on the bill.
*Giant ongoing mess with billing and everything. DVR and TV quality are outstanding.*


Buy townhouse, move, call cable company (Brighthouse)
Me: Oh hay! I have free basic cable from the HOA, but I want an HD DVR on top of that, and my employer needs to pay for a cable modem over the same cable.
Brighthouse: No problem. Of course the free portion counts towards your fees so you pay $little, but the employer portion comes off the top. Let us figure this out and call you back.
*three hours go by*
Brighthouse: Hi! We have it all set up. Sorry for the delay, we had to coordinate between residential, bulk and enterprise group accounts. Here's how it's set up: *Insert complex tale of three separate accounts on my address*
Me: Sweet.
*Not a single problem since then. DVR and TV quality sucks, though.*