Obvious advice

[beetiger]

I've been very frustrated by my oracles of late. I've participated in haikujaguar's generous Balance Cards One Card Draw twice recently. One reading was about life path, and it told me I needed to balance work and family. For the second one, I said that I'd like to focus on my personal relationships, and it said "Go ahead, that's a good idea." Whenever I pull out the tarot cards, they just tell me mostly the same thing. What I really want,of course, is a new answer, something that illuminates the issue in a way that somehow will see me through it. But I'm not getting that. I probably can't get past this, because somehow I'm not doing this stuff, not doing it right anyway.

So I'm going to put it out to the universe, and maybe to you too. Here, give me stupidly obvious advice that I certainly know, but don't seem how to handle correctly. I'll start.

-You can't make anyone behave the way you want them to. You can't make anyone feel the way you want them to.

-Binge eating isn't really very good for anything.

-Children learn much more from your behavior than from your words.

-Sleep helps.

-It is not anyone else's obligation to meet your personal needs.

Comments

[ex-prunesnp.livejournal.com]

Eat breakfast regularly and take a walk every day?

[kibbles.livejournal.com]

Don't be afraid to ask for help, and accept help graciously. Don't let pride get in the way of genuine offers for help and support.

[haikujaguar.livejournal.com]

This is a really good one.

[kibbles.livejournal.com]

Also, be ok with you admitting you are wrong, so you can move on and go to the next step. All to often my pride leads me to insist and act as if I am right, and it just makes things harder to fix. Sometimes just on an emotional level, sometimes on a very real level, like a financial one.

[eunice-branca.livejournal.com]

I don't have any good advice but I certainly love the couple you listed in your post!

[momentrabbit.livejournal.com]

Personal mantra: 3am is rarely a good time to try to resolve anything.

Several of your advice bullets seem to condense down to 'Take care of yourself', both physically and mentally (loaded word - 'spiritually?').

Perhaps "It's (ok/good/important) to (take care of/meet/satisfy) your own needs?"

[heavenscalyx.livejournal.com]

Therapy good (with a good therapist).

(Just re-realized this for myself.)

[akycha.livejournal.com]

It's not a matter of whether you deserve a cookie, it's a matter of whether you want a cookie. Everyone deserves to eat.

(The best anti-binge eating advice I know, along with:)

Your body is like a small child, doing the best it can with what it has. Hating it doesn't make any sense at all because it cannot hate you back. It can only try to take care of you and send you urgent messages about what you (plural) need.

(I didn't come up with the latter one, but it's helped me a lot over the years.)

[terrycloth.livejournal.com]

Take the money you would have spent on binge eating, and pay people to behave the way you want and meet your personal needs?

Advice void where prohibited by law!

[redbird]

Tea is good, but too much can be bad for you. The same is true of exercise.

[chipuni.livejournal.com]

- A closed mouth gathers no foot.

- If you give a man a fire, he'll be warm for the next hour. If you set a man on fire, he'll be warm for the rest of his life.

- A certain amount of opposition is a help, not a hindrance. Kites rise
against the wind, not with it.

- Orgasms cost nothing, and make the world a happier place.

- A handful of friends is worth more than a wagon of gold.

- A man who carries a cat by its tail learns something he can learn
in no other way.

- A watched clock never boils.

- Every silver lining has a cloud around it.

- Birds of a feather flock to a newly washed car.

- If you would keep a secret from an enemy, tell it not to a friend.

- No excellent soul is exempt from a mixture of madness.

- The early worm gets eaten.

- Time's fun when you're eating flies -- Kermit the Frog

- While there's life, there's hope.