(no subject)

[beetiger]

There really is no such thing as anonymity.

I've caught(now ex-)friends cheating on their spouses via the Internet, without even meaning to, just because various circles of friends weren't as far isolated as they'd perhaps hoped.

This case really caught my attention today -- a smart kid with a few little bits of information, a mouth swab and a few hundred dollars was able to find the "anonymous" sperm donor that is his genetic father.

In my view of the universe, we're all connected, and the history of the world is coded into our bodies and minds. It's fascinating to see that power released.

There's crap floating around Google that I posted back in Usenet in the late eighties on random newsgroups. I'm not going to point you to it, but it's not hard to find.

I've had things I'm not happy about written about me on LJ or mailing lists, with names changed to supposedly keep things a little more private. But writers have styles, and personal information gets around easily, and I'm pretty sure there are a few people who could figure all the details out from what they were reading and a few keystrokes, if they were curious enough to look.

There's a reason I'm not cagey about using real names on here, or at least not much. I think pretending that much of this information is private is really just a false comfort.

I may not be very proud of some of the things I do, and I certainly don't share everything that's on my mind, body, and soul here. But I try never to act as if the cloak of the Internet, or a pseudonym, or a fake email account is going to give me the cover to do something I wouldn't do with my name attached to it. Not only is that a crappy way to live life, but I think ultimately it just doesn't really work.

Comments

[tikvah.livejournal.com]

Amen.

[perlandria.livejournal.com]

I've watched the live console for a local multiline bbs as someone wrote a confessional letter, then erased it keystroke by keystroke and sent a lie instead.

Amen

[r-ness.livejournal.com]

There's a reason I'm not cagey about using real names on here, or at least not much. I think pretending that much of this information is private is really just a false comfort.

I do try not to use real names around here, just because I want people to put in a little effort if they're going to get all stalker-y. And I have a lot of friends who would prefer that I didn't, so I don't.

I mean, everything you type onto the Internet should be something you can cope with having on a billboard over I-5, but I figure people should have to work a bit if they really want to know everything.

[beetiger.livejournal.com]

*nods* Yeah, there is value in making people do that work if they want to track you down ...as long as you keep aware that it's not really *that* much work.

[(Anonymous)]

It's true that it's not, but it is *some* work, however little. That distinction makes all the difference; that person or entity cannot later plausibly deny they went to some effort, however small, to obtain information.

And that distinction is actionable, both in a court of law, and otherwise. :)

Grrr...that was me. Stupid LJ.

[r-ness.livejournal.com]

It's true that it's not, but it is *some* work, however little. That distinction makes all the difference; that person or entity cannot later plausibly deny they went to some effort, however small, to obtain information.

And that distinction is actionable, both in a court of law, and otherwise. :)

[redbird]

More or less.

On the other hand, one of my partners is "Q" here, and in other online references, not because zir identity is a deep dark secret, but because we have reasons to not want it to be too obvious who zie is to someone who doesn't know us personally. If and when that changes--and we expect it to at some point--I'll be very happy to stop using that initial and replace it with zir real name.

[m0nkeygrl.livejournal.com]

I'm not all that shy about my personal details to the people on my friend's list, but I usually use nicknames/initials for non-LJ friends out of respect for their privacy.

Like you, I've done some things I'm not really proud of and learned some hard lessons from them. However, I realized my mistakes, told the offended party what my mistakes were, asked for forgiveness and got it. I still have to live with what I did and the should have known betters of the situation, though.

[collie13.livejournal.com]

I quite agree. My mother used to say, "Never say anything about anyone that you're not willing to say right to their face." I've done my best to hold to that standard both on line and off, and it's served me well. Though she'll probably never see it, here's a belated but heartfelt 'Thanks, Mom.' ;)

[marram.livejournal.com]

I basically agree with what you're saying, but I'm a bit confused about your views of what others are doing along those lines. Are you suggesting people should openly name others when sharing information on-line? (Sorry, I just got a bit confused on some of the aspects of your broader point...) :)

[beetiger.livejournal.com]

I think people should behave in online spaces as they'd like to be seen offline. And I think people who are relying on pseudonyms/online anonymity are mostly fooling themselves.

It doesn't bother me if people prefer to use pseudonyms for reasons that are more about privacy than about anonymity, if that distinction makes sense.

[marram.livejournal.com]

I can see what you're driving at now, and that's pretty much where my confusion was coming from. And yes, anonymity shouldn't be viewed as an excuse to behave irresponsibly -- ever.

And it was nice chatting with you, too! I haven't bugged in forever. I also hope the world of RPGs is still treating you folks nicely! :)

[r-ness.livejournal.com]

Yah, I think that really clarifies the issue for me, too.

I stand behind everthing I post or say.

I just don't want marketeers and spammers to be able to use the stuff I put up without making an effort.

[terrycloth.livejournal.com]

Most of the 'anonymity' of the internet is really just 'I don't live anywhere near any of these people, so I can stop associating with them if I want to'.

Hell, even if I *did* live next door to someone that I got sick of online (or vice versa), it's not like we're likely to ever meet offline unless we make an effort.

All the time you see stalkers posting, "Look! Here's this person's real name and address! Ha ha ha!" and I'm like, so what? Am I going to drive 200 miles to harass them? Are you? Not likely.

[cktraveler.livejournal.com]

All the time you see stalkers posting, "Look! Here's this person's real name and address! Ha ha ha!" and I'm like, so what? Am I going to drive 200 miles to harass them? Are you? Not likely.

On the other hand, sometimes they post the phone number too. And that is a problem.

[terrycloth.livejournal.com]

You answer your phone?

[cktraveler.livejournal.com]

As Pavlovian a device as it is, it's the primary means of communication of most of the mundane world ... such as employers.

[cktraveler.livejournal.com]

On the one hand, I acknowledge that ultimately there is no such thing as privacy. Someone who knows some basic hacking and research techniques can find out a lot based on a very little to go on.

However, when someone openly posted my name, address, and phone number on Usenet as a smartass response to my saying something like "I change my handle periodically," I left that newsgroup -- and Usenet -- permanently, and I'm told the user who did it was roasted over the coals for it afterwards.

Information's out there, but not everyone knows how to get it. It still pays to be careful what you say in public formats.

I think people put too much faith in referring to people by letters or using nicknames, but if it makes them feel better, it makes them feel better. I've posted naked photographs with my face visible to unmoderated public forums, so it's not necessarily something I'm too concerned about.